ShareNavigating the Marijuana Conversation with Teens: A Parent’s Guide
As a parent, one of the most challenging things to navigate is the issue of marijuana use among teens. We all know that adolescence is a time of exploration, testing boundaries, and trying new things. For many teens, marijuana is one of those things they experiment with. The question is: How do we, as parents, approach the subject in a way that encourages understanding, healthy choices, and open communication?
In this post, I want to share my thoughts on this topic, particularly around the conversation on marijuana use and its impact on teen brain development. It’s a tough issue, but I believe that by shifting our perspective and communication approach, we can help our teens make safer, more informed decisions.
The Changing Face of Marijuana
We’ve got to talk about teen brain development and cannabis—especially the super potent THC levels in today’s products. This isn’t the weed of the ’80s or ’90s. High-potency cannabis, especially in vapes and concentrates, is delivering THC levels up to 90%, and research is showing it can seriously disrupt the developing teen brain. We’re talking changes in memory, attention, motivation, and even increased risk for anxiety, depression, and psychosis—especially when use starts young and is frequent. And while smoking, vaping, and edibles all carry risk, vaping and dabbing deliver much higher concentrations of THC, faster, which may intensify the impact. Edibles, on the other hand, hit more slowly but can also lead to higher doses because it’s harder to tell when you’ve had enough.
The challenge, however, isn’t just in knowing that marijuana is more potent. It’s in understanding how we, as parents, respond to it. As parents, we’ve got to lead with curiosity and connection, not fear—but it’s important to be real about the risks. This stuff is powerful, and our kids’ brains are still under construction.
The Paradox of Parenting: Control vs. Influence
Here’s the paradox of parenting: While we can’t control every decision our teen makes, we still have a responsibility to guide them. When it comes to marijuana, I know that my teen might try it at some point, whether I like it or not. But just because I can’t stop it doesn’t mean I can’t influence how they approach it.
I believe the key is open, non-judgmental conversations. Instead of making it a “forbidden” subject, I want to talk about it openly and without shame. If I approach the topic with curiosity and empathy, rather than anger or guilt, I create an environment where my teen feels safe to talk to me about their experiences and choices.
Embracing Harm Reduction
When it comes to marijuana and teens, I think the best approach isn’t strict prohibition but harm reduction. This means that while I don’t condone marijuana use, I want to equip my teen with the knowledge to make safer decisions if they ever choose to experiment.
I’m not here to lecture, but I want them to think critically about their decisions. For instance, I would encourage them to ask themselves these questions before they decide to use marijuana:
- “Are the people around me looking out for my safety?”
- “Is this a safe environment?”
- “What might the consequences of this decision be?”
By teaching them how to assess a situation, set personal limits, and handle peer pressure, I hope they can make more informed choices. It’s about providing them with the tools to think through situations, rather than just telling them “don’t do it.”
Building Trust and Communication
A big part of this is building a relationship based on trust. I don’t want my teen to feel like they have to hide things from me. Instead, I want them to feel like they can come to me with anything—even if they know it might disappoint me.
In my experience, the more I model open communication, the more likely my teen is to engage with me honestly. Instead of just telling them what to do, I ask questions that encourage reflection and conversation. For example:
- “What’s your experience with marijuana at school?”
- “What are your friends saying about it?”
- “How do you feel about using it?”
- “What makes you comfortable or uncomfortable about it?”
These questions aren’t meant to judge but to open up a dialogue. I want my teen to feel heard and respected, and I want to know what’s really going on in their world.
Setting Clear Boundaries
While I’m all for open conversations, it’s also crucial to set clear, consistent boundaries. I need to be clear about my values and expectations, and I need to enforce those boundaries calmly and consistently.
If marijuana use becomes a regular part of my teen’s life, it’s important to have consequences that make sense. For example, I might tighten curfews or adjust other privileges until I see a shift in their behavior. These boundaries should be reasonable, related to the behavior, and followed through consistently.
It’s not about being a “bad cop” but about creating structure and accountability. Teens need limits, just like we did at their age, and it’s our responsibility to help them understand that there are consequences to their actions.
The Bigger Picture: A Healthy Approach to Risky Behavior
While marijuana is a key topic, I think this approach applies to any risky behavior—whether it’s drugs, alcohol, or even things like excessive screen time. The goal is to help my teen make smart decisions in the face of peer pressure, curiosity, and the inevitable temptation to try things that could be harmful.
I’m not going to be able to prevent everything, but I can empower my teen with knowledge, responsibility, and self-awareness. By doing so, I hope they can make healthier choices and feel comfortable turning to me when they need guidance.
Final Thoughts
Talking about marijuana with teens isn’t easy, but it’s necessary. If we want to help our teens navigate this challenging time in their lives, we need to focus on understanding, communication, and respect. Yes, there will be mistakes along the way, but with the right approach, we can give our teens the tools they need to make safer, more informed decisions.
As a parent, I know that the key to addressing tough topics like marijuana use isn’t control—it’s conversation. If I can keep the lines of communication open, build trust, and maintain clear boundaries, I’ll be better equipped to support my teen through whatever challenges come their way.
From Joyful Courage Episode 309: Paradox, Parenting, Pot Smoking
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