Eps 220: SOLO SHOW digging into strategies for creating space for emotional safety

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Today is a solo show – YAY!

Coming off of the mental health mini summit… I am reminded time and time again about the importance of creating an environment that support our kids-teens in being who they are. A space that feels emotionally safe.

We hold the container, we set the tone, right?

Before we can do that we really need to decide what it is that we want to create? 

Speaking with clients about this, before a big conversation or event, I will aks them, well, what is it you want to create? What is most important for you that your child receives?

Strategies for creating a home environment that nurtures safety

  • Routines/Consistency/dependable structure 

  • Asking permission/Being curious

  • Being available/Non judgmental

  • Validate their experience

  • Own your stuff

  • Trust that your kids ARE thinking about what is best for them

  • Power of perspective – 3 bs and the outside observer, remembering the iceberg

Therapy – 

One of the things that has been really useful for me lately that I am digging into through therapy is identifying key times in my life where I felt lost, isolated, and really pulled away from my parents…. And if I could go back that that girl to tell her what she needs to hear….  Some of what has come up has been:

This must be really hard, it must feel really confusing
You are ok just as you are, you are enough and worthy of love
I am here for you

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