Eps 244: Connie Feutz Teaches Us How To Be Mindful With Our Partners


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Connie Fuetz is a clinician with over 35 years of clinical experience who specializes in working with couples and is one of the six original Master Clinicians invited into the Gottman Institute in 2000, John Gottman has called Connie “an extraordinarily-gifted couples counselor” to whom he would send his own family.  

After leading the two-day Art and Science of Love workshops in Chicago for years, Connie created her own one-day workshop for couples called the Mindful Couples Workshop, which she led for years in Bellingham WA and Victoria BC.  She has expanded that course into a 5-week online course for couples, called A Mindful Love Course. A couple’s workshop you can do from the comfort of your own home.

Connie feels blessed and honoured in her work alongside couples.  A resident of the Northwest for 35 years, she lives in gorgeous Bellingham WA with her family.


 Takeaways from the show:

  • The depth of couples therapy can be challenging and profound

  • Both parties are responsible for change in therapy

  • Focusing on your relationship with your partner will help your teen

  • Why mindfulness is so important in our intimate relationships

  • Tools to help you choose in to your partner

  • How marathon intensive therapy is helpful

  • Not engaging when flooding

  • Naming the negative interactive cycle that happens when we’re in distress

  • Prompting a healing conversation

  • Having humility and vulnerability in conversations with your partner

  • Making sure the message of love gets through

  • How the pandemic has been causing stress in households

  • Dealing with perpetual issues in a different way because of COVID

  • Setting the context for the spirit of intention

  • How dedicating little bits of time to your relationship will keep it alive

  • Switching from a business type of relationship to a romantic one

  • Using persuasion in a safe way

  • The importance of being on equal ground with your partner

  • Learning your partner’s love language

Find Connie/resources:

Website | Mindful Love Course | COVID resources

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

I love that phrase. That concept, those words. To me I’d have to say because we’re talking about relationships, it means grounding myself in the courage to look at myself, at my triggers, at my missteps, but to look at myself with joy rather than with judgment. The courage to look at me and the parts of myself that are blooming and the parts of myself that might be dark, but to do so joyfully and lovingly.


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