Bonus Parenting in the Digital Age Telesummit

Transcription

Casey O'Roarty 0:00
Joyful courage, parenting podcast. Bonus episode, Susan stiffelman and parenting in the digital age. Telesummit.

Hey listeners, welcome back to the podcast, and I have a bonus episode for you today. I am so excited to be talking with Susan stiffelman. She is an amazing human being and somebody who's really on the front lines, as far as working and helping parents. She writes for Huffington Post. She's written a few books. She is leading a tele summit in a few weeks called parenting in the digital age. And you won't believe the lineup of speakers that she's going to be interviewing on this really important topic, which is the fact that we are raising children in a digital age. I mean, I don't know about you. I don't know how it's shown up for you, I've got two different lenses. My one lens is I love my smartphone, and I know that there are times when I should be putting it down and paying more attention to my family, and that is an area where I tend to notice and get curious about I also have children who are, you know, technology is just a part of their life. Our kids, this is the normal for them. And with one daughter who is venturing into social media, and my son who loves finding funny videos on YouTube. It gets messy and slippery and tricky, and so Susan is this amazing human. She's a marriage and family therapist, a credentialed teacher and a licensed psychotherapist. She's worked with families for over 30 years to create greater harmony and deeper connection between parents and kids. Like I said, she's in Huffington Post. She's been on The Today Show. She wrote one book called parenting with presents, and another called parenting without power struggles. And what she's going to talk about today on the show is this telesummit. And I know probably many of you are thinking like, What the heck is a telesummit? So I'm excited that you're listening in, because it's not as complicated as you think. It's basically four days of conversation that you get to listen in on with time for to with time to catch a replay if you can't make it to the live conversation and and I just think it's a really powerful way to share a whole bunch of information that's really helpful to parents. So I thought, You know what, I'm gonna bring Susan on the show. Get to know her a bit and let her talk about her offer. So let's hear more about it again. Thanks for being here. Welcome Susan stiffelman to the joyful courage Podcast. I'm so glad to have you.

Susan Stiffelman 3:15
What a fun thing to be part of. Thanks for inviting me, Casey,

Casey O'Roarty 3:18
You are so welcome, and I am so excited to share with my listeners this amazing offer that you have coming up later this month, the parenting in the digital age Summit, online Summit. Tell us a little bit about about what you're creating for parents.

Susan Stiffelman 3:37
Oh my gosh, I'm super excited. You know, it's so much work. And sometimes when I take on something that has a lot of work, it just becomes a lot of work. And this has been just joyful straight through, because I get to talk with the most incredible people about a topic that I hear parents struggling with every day, you know, which is, how do I manage screens in our house. I want my kids to be tech savvy. I want them to benefit from everything that the internet and social media even offer. I don't want them to be left out in the cold. Most parents, not all. Some are just forget it. We don't want it. But you know, how can I do that when it it's like, the minute the switch goes on,

everything gets shut out. The kid goes into this trance. You know, it's impossible to get them to turn it off. We have these arguments and constant negotiations. So, you know, I write a column every week for The Huffington Post. I'm their parenting expert, so I have this column and so many of the questions that come in are around this, that it finally made me realize that this would be a great topic to choose for my next series. I do these series from time to time and that. And so this one is really going to be about. So providing parents with a wide array of information, strategies, content, tip, tips about how to interact with their kids in ways that not only make present day parenting and family life less ruled by the screen, so to speak, less have it be less of a constant battlefield. But also, and I think of more interest to me, and more importance, ultimately, is, how can we raise kids so that they're self regulating and they go into their own adult lives when we're not hovering over them or switching off the router, so that they have an internal guidance system that allows them to know when enough is enough and stay fully engaged in in the 3d world. Oh

Casey O'Roarty 5:48
my gosh, that's so exciting. And I'm excited too for my own learning, right? Because I think many of us who are parents, you know when, when we get really honest and look at our own use. You know, what kind of models are we? So I'm really excited to hear from your speakers, oh my gosh. And your lineup is just unbelievable. I mean, oh my gosh. Byron Katie, who I just got to see here in Seattle, and Dr Dan Siegel, whose name comes up all the time on the podcast, and when I teach live classes as well. For listeners, he's the brain in the palm of the hand, guy that I talk about so much. And Roslyn Wiseman, Queen Bees and Wannabes. Author, She's incredible. So I'm looking at this lineup and tell me about how how the series works. So you were saying before I hit record, that you're actually interviewing each of the speakers, correct? And then is there kind of a different angle or different topic that you go with each person? Yeah,

Susan Stiffelman 6:51
well, for sure, because you know, with Dr Siegel, we're talking about the impact on the brain, and also with Dr Victoria Dunkley, who wrote a great book called reset your child's brain with Glennon Doyle Melton from monastery. I don't know if you follow her work a little bit, or Rachel Macy Stafford Yes, Revolution like these are women that are really sharing with hundreds of 1000s of their tribes about the real, nitty gritty experiences of raising kids. And then there's, you know, I have a conversation actually, with someone from Washington State who's has a rehab program for Internet addiction, and they're just about to open it up to teenagers. Right now, it's 18 above. So each person you know, Byron Katie, of course, will be talking about using the work, which, if people aren't familiar with looking at the ways that we internally hold ourselves, so that when we do approach our kids around a difficult challenge or something they may push back on, we're more present and available to deal with it as what I call in my work, the captain of the ship, as opposed to moving into lawyer mode with our kids or dictator mode we're trying to control and overpower them. So each of these speakers will present from their own expertise and angle, you know, Rosalind Wiseman with very practical tips. What do you do if your child's being bullied online, or what about group texting? And so there's a whole, I mean, every angle we're covering, so that by the end, parents who have tuned in, and I'll tell you how you do that in a minute, they're just better educated. They've, they've, they're, you know, they've got more information with which they could make their own personal choices and decisions for what's best for their family, with their particular kids. So the way it works is that you can log on online. When people register and you're, I think you're going to give them a link. It's all yes to hear these replays. If they can't listen live, they get 48 hours during which time they can tune into to each of these speakers, and they get to hear the conversation, and they can do that through the internet. Eventually, if they've missed them or they just want to have them, they'll be offered a chance to have access permanently to the replays and an option to download the audio so that they can listen to wherever they go. So we're trying to make it really easy for people to absorb the material, you know, when it's convenient for them and and and set it up so that, you know, you can tune in and just bask in the wisdom. And, my gosh, yeah, I've even set up a Facebook page so that people who are signing up are offered a chance to to start right now taking part in the conversations that we're having. I'm posting some of my content up there as well for parents to start to digest and think about, yeah,

Casey O'Roarty 9:50
that is just brilliant. And how exciting for all of us to get to tune in in real time and hear these conversations. So, um. Um, so how does it? So you talked a little bit about how it works, but so I know that the dates are February, 24 25th 26th and 27th

Susan Stiffelman 10:08
actually, I think it's the 23rd 24th 25th and 26th okay,

Casey O'Roarty 10:13
I'm on your website, and it says the 24th through the 27th so go

Susan Stiffelman 10:17
to my calendar. It should be, it should be 23rd Oops. Okay,

Casey O'Roarty 10:23
there you go, right. Well, so it's the 23rd through the 26th Yeah. And then what time of day?

Susan Stiffelman 10:33
1012, two, four and six or 1012? Two and four. Okay, two of the days we have five speakers, and two of the days we'll have four speakers. That's the way it's looking right now. There may be one more person that comes on, but that's the plan. And then they'll be given an email. So if they register, they'll be sent an email that will give them the link to each of those speakers for the next day. And I think they're going to be sent a reminder as well. We really, you know, we don't like bombarding people with emails, but we also want to make sure that people are alerted. Sure. So it's a, it's a balancing act, but we hope to do our best on that. So

Casey O'Roarty 11:10
it's really like being at an amazing conference from the comfort of your own home.

Speaker 1 11:15
That's exactly what it is that's great. And then 48 hours. I

Casey O'Roarty 11:20
mean, if you can't make it to all the speakers, you have time to pick and choose, or time to, you know, find it, you know, make available being able to listen to the recording. So I think that is fabulous. And that's all really easy. I mean, you get an email like this person just spoke, and here's the replay. Yeah, that works, awesome. So listeners, don't be afraid of the technology around this. It's really what I'm hearing you say, Susan, is it's very user friendly, and you want to make it as easy as possible for parents, that is.

Susan Stiffelman 11:50
And the truth is, you know, like this is, I've been doing summits now for several years. I did one on parenting with presents. Twice, I had people like Arianna Huffington and Jane Goodall and Congressman Tim Ryan and and it's been an interesting observation to see people figuring out how to use it, because, yeah, there's that initial What do I do? But after that get to like, I know I'll be doing more of these. One on divorce, one on parenting children with anxiety, and it's just such a convenient way to learn from real people. Yeah, and, and so, yeah, it's a very simple couple of clicks, and you're in

Casey O'Roarty 12:37
great so I will make sure to put the link on the in the show notes in this podcast, so that people know exactly how to sign up. You'll get to sign up through me. Yay. And this is just, this is just fabulous. Susan, thank you so much for putting this together and for all your hard work and gathering these speakers and holding these interviews, I'm so excited to listen in on all this goodness. Well,

Susan Stiffelman 13:06
you know, I've just been working on an email today for people to receive after they register. And one of the things that I want people who like your your tribe right now, if you're listening to this, start thinking about what, how has technology really served you? And I think we know, we know it brings us together. It lets you stay in closer touch with distant friends and family. It's an incredible asset for like things like this the summit, we can look things up and learn. And so I want parents to know that you know, to be thinking about, okay, these are the pluses. These are the pieces that I want to preserve and make sure that our lifestyle allows each member of the family, including the adults, to enjoy and benefit from and then I'm inviting parents before the summit to start thinking about, where is the breakdown. So you might start thinking before we begin, what in particular would your intention be? Because I'm I'm really big on parents taking a before they take one of my classes. Think about where you want to end up. Yeah, and I think it's a really great way to begin a learning experience. You know, when I'm doing a phone coaching session, one of the first things I'll say to someone is, okay, let's say we hang up the phone in a half an hour an hour. What insight? What plan, what strategy, what internal obstacle will you have dealt with? What will you have acquired? So as you're listening parents, think about we know, you know what's great about technology. What do you hope you can learn? What challenge Are you currently facing that you want to kind of get a handle on, or a plan for addressing, and and so start the conversation in your own head or with your friends. You know, where is the breakdown? Is it that you're afraid to ask your kids to to hit the off switch because of their aggressive anger or their behavior, or. Or are you uncertain because you just don't know how young is? Too young to let a child have social media or their own smartphone. So be thinking about the areas that you know that challenge you, so that as you listen, you'll be able to, directly, you know, get help in those things. I think it's helpful.

Casey O'Roarty 15:16
Yeah, definitely helpful. Yeah. Setting our intention for sure, we talk a lot about that on the podcast. Who do we want to be? What do we want to get from this? You know? And I shared with you, and I think the listeners may or may not have heard me say this already in the last couple weeks, but I have a 13 year old, and she is now on Instagram, and I find myself dancing with obsession around wanting to know what's happening for her on Instagram, and she lets me follow her, and I'm not allowed to like or comment, which is fine. I do not have to. I have no problem lurking, but you know, it's so easy to get wrapped up in some of the worst case scenario stories that are showing up in the news, you know. And I just think about my sweet daughter, and I mean, yes, so I definitely have an intention going in and, you know, and it's around because I've sent her a couple articles, and she texted me back and said, Mom, quit reading these articles. No, and I kind of am sending them to her, like as a joke, like, see, this really happens, you know, but she's like, enough, enough. So I'm really, really with for my own parenting lens, looking forward to to listening in on this summit. Thank you. Great. Great, definitely. Okay, well, thank you for taking the time to come on and be on the show and listeners again, go into the show notes, and you'll see all the links that you need to sign up. And don't feel like you know, remember that when you sign up for this kind of stuff, there is room to play with the 48 hours of of replay. And you know, just think about what it is you want to get out of it. It's free to start. So that's exciting, yeah, all right. Well, thank you, Susan,

Susan Stiffelman 17:12
thank you. Thanks for having me. Bye. Bye. Casey,

Casey O'Roarty 17:21
how exciting is that? Oh my gosh. I am so, so excited for this telesummit. It couldn't have becoming at a better time for me and our family as we dive into an evolution in our screen time. I'll put it like that. So yeah, if you're in, if you're down, if you want to check this out, please go to the show notes, and you will see a link for registering for the telesummit. All you got to do is click on the link and there'll be a place for you to put your name and your email, and that is it you are in, and they will keep you up to date, as Susan said, as far as when to tune in for these conversations, and I love that we have 48 hours to listen to each of the calls or each of the conversations, if our busy lives keep us from, you know, sitting down and really listening and watching their videos, watching the conversations unfold. So yay. Check the show notes. Thank you so much for listening to this short little bonus episode. Remember that I love feedback, so send me some Casey at joyful courage.com. You can post feedback on the iTunes page, letting you know, writing a review, giving me five stars, and don't forget to join us on the live in love with joyful courage. Facebook page, facebook group page. There are great conversations happening there all the time, and I would love for you to be in on it. So ask to join. I will say yes, accept, and you'll be in. Also, don't forget that the joyful courage baby carrier drive is happening. So listen to that podcast episode. It was a few episodes ago, and we're collecting baby carriers for refugees showing up in Greece. It's a great cause. Get in on it. We would love for the tribe to really show up for this again. I will make sure there are links in the show notes to that as well. Okay, my friends, be good. Be Love. And enjoy the rest of your day. Thanks for listening.