Eps 495: Showing up for our LGBTQIA+ kids with Ed Center and Jaimie Kelton

Episode 496

My guests today are Ed Center and Jaimie Kelton, and they’re answering questions from YOU!  This is a juicy one – we get into how to react when your LGBTQIA+ teen comes out, whose news that is to share with others, and what to do when people who don’t treat our adolescent(s) the way we’d like (cue Mama Bear).  The latter half of the episode gets into online safety & pornography, the importance of knowing queer role models in real life, using TV & books as teaching tools, and talking about sex with our queer kids.  

Guest Description 

Listeners will remember Ed from Earlier this year, episode 451 – from power struggles to connection – he was a kid with big feelings and impulsive behaviors. He drove his parents and teachers bonkers. Now he helps grown-ups understand and support these kids. Ed is a queer brown dad who coaches parents, educators, and kid-raisers toward greater connection, calm, and joy. He focuses on the needs of families of color, helping people to tap into cultural wisdom while interrupting intergenerational pain.

Jaimie Kelton is an award-winning podcast host and author.  She is co-author of the book based on her podcast, If These Ovaries Could Talk, The Thing’s We’ve Learned About Making an LGBTQ Family.  She is a Helen Hayes and SOVAS Award winner whose voice can be heard as Bo Peep in Syfy Network’s, Happy!, as well as on many hit cartoons. She lives with her wife and children in Manhattan.

Jaimie and Ed often collaborate on her IG and podcast: the queer family podcast.  Jaime and Ed are here today to talk about some of the questions that YOU wrote in with, in celebration of PRIDE month.

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Takeaways from the show

  • What’s the preferred and most up-to-date language and acronym?  Do we say queer? 
  • What can straight parents do to best support their questioning or queer teen? 
  • Coming out stories and reactions – whose news is this to share? 
  • Coming out is an ongoing process.  It is hard & scary! 
  • We all hold internalized homophobia
  • How do we handle family or friends who don’t support our queer teen? 
  • “Choose love, choose love, choose love.” 
  • Online safety 
  • The importance of knowing real-life queer role models 
  • Sex-ed & sex talks with our queer kids 
  • Consent versus enthusiastic consent

What does joyful courage mean to you


I think particularly since this is Joyful Courage, but gay, episode, joyful courage means pursuing joy with full authenticity for who you are, right?  So back to the message with families, we get to be fully us and we’re going to claim that.  Pride month is all about saying that’s a human right, so joy in our relationships, our parenting, in our relationships with our parents, everyone.  I’m going to be fully authentic, and can I still find joy and love in this relationship?  Let’s celebrate that.  – Ed 


For me, I can’t stop thinking about this thing I’m going through right now in my life which has to do with my kids’ school, the district, and the parents at our school.  There’s a huge divide happening and it looks like Moms for Liberty has infiltrated NYC a bit and is messing with District 2, which is where Chelsea and Greenwich Village are, which is interesting.  There’s some stuff going down, some anti-, whatever, and there’s kind of a fight between parents happening, in a way.  I’ve been really firmly, obviously on one side of this fight and speaking out a lot, and I’m getting some push back from parents I love and adore, which has been hard for me.  I’ve been questioning myself: Am I going too hard?  Is this too much?  Am I being too much?  So for me, joyful courage is – I just asked myself this last night after this insane email and made me start doubting myself – it came down to, wait a second – I have nothing to be ashamed of.  I’m being courageous.  I’m standing in my power, and I believe 100%, full-heartedly, when I deeply think about this issue, there’s no other side.  This is authentically me and my truth.  There’s nothing in this I have to be ashamed of.  That’s joyful courage.  If I can feel this over something I have conviction over, that’s joyful courage.  – Jamie



Joyful Courage Episode 451: From Power Struggles to Connection with Ed Center 

Joyful Courage Episode 481: Let’s Talk about Porn with Amy Lang and Christy Keating 

The Queer Family Podcast 

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The Queer Family Podcast on Patreon

The Village Well 

Village Well Parenting on Instagram

Ed on TikTok

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