Positive Discipline Parenting Blog

Siblings: Get them in the ring

The most popular night of my seven-week Positive Discipline parenting series is the night we finally get to talk about siblings. From the first week, this is a source of angst for parents. It is on every list of challenges that we make, and usually the sibling fighting is a trigger that brings out the “Final straw! I’ve had it, that’s it!” moment in the night where we turn into the version of our parents we swore we would never become. It takes a full six weeks of building on parenting tools before we can get to this meaty and layered challenge. In this class, I always start by asking that same question, “what did you learn from your siblings?” After some scoffing, the answers range from:

Special Time, a Super Tool to Stop Attention Seeking

I have a secret. I am not enough. Yep, not enough. No matter what the self-help books and Instagram quotes say, I will never ever be enough. My kids will always want more. Once I realized I am THAT loved by them, and THAT important to them, I stopped trying to chase the “end.” One more game, one more hug- nope, they will never be filled. This is a GOOD thing. It means that our open channel of attachment, love, and connection is always flowing. It also means I am human and so are they. This is when I started implementing, with fidelity, the simple Positive Discipline tool called Special Time.

Solutions: The Antidote to Consequences, Punishment and Rewards

One of my favorite classes in my counseling graduate program was Group Therapy. I loved reading Irvin Yalom’s big thick book that described all the stages a group goes through, then actually getting to participate in the experience and watching how it played out. In essence, every group starts out with some sort of orientation […]