Positive Discipline Parenting Blog

Wired for Independence: How skills boost self-esteem

“Your preschooler will never learn to make decisions, learn new skills, or trust his own abilities if you don’t make room for him to ​​practice. Parenting in the preschool years involves a great deal of letting go…True self-esteem does not come from being loved, praised or showered with goodies—it comes from having skills…Working together to […]

The Cookie Party

It started when my oldest was almost 4 and her sister was still an infant. Somehow, we found ourselves in Pottery Barn Kids just after Thanksgiving. Like any other 3-year-old, she wanted everything in the store. Given that not a single item was within our budget, I had to use our usual line of: “We are just browsing not buying today. There is nothing on our list from here.” But there was one thing she became obsessed with. It was a “cookie party box”, which had everything you needed to host the party: invitations, aprons, a few cookie cutters, etc. All for the low price of a thousand dollars, more or less. I COULDN’T DO IT.

Siblings: Get them in the ring

The most popular night of my seven-week Positive Discipline parenting series is the night we finally get to talk about siblings. From the first week, this is a source of angst for parents. It is on every list of challenges that we make, and usually the sibling fighting is a trigger that brings out the “Final straw! I’ve had it, that’s it!” moment in the night where we turn into the version of our parents we swore we would never become. It takes a full six weeks of building on parenting tools before we can get to this meaty and layered challenge. In this class, I always start by asking that same question, “what did you learn from your siblings?” After some scoffing, the answers range from:

A Brave New World of Solid Food

Eating healthy and enjoying food is part of our family culture. My partner and I love making intricate meals with a variety of spices. Our spice cabinet is one of my prized places, with four shelves stocked full of global deliciousness. When my child started solid foods at 6 months, we had two family values […]

Airports, Planes and Poop: How I survived my first solo flight with a baby

Are you flying solo with your baby? Here are some tips and tools for flying with infants. At 7 months I was finally ready to take a solo plane trip with the baby. My other half was in Colorado for work, so we decided to visit him for a long weekend. Luckily, the flight from Seattle to Denver is only a couple hours but as any new experience with the baby, it was a logistical challenge I was a little anxious to tackle. The prep...

Special Time, a Super Tool to Stop Attention Seeking

I have a secret. I am not enough. Yep, not enough. No matter what the self-help books and Instagram quotes say, I will never ever be enough. My kids will always want more. Once I realized I am THAT loved by them, and THAT important to them, I stopped trying to chase the “end.” One more game, one more hug- nope, they will never be filled. This is a GOOD thing. It means that our open channel of attachment, love, and connection is always flowing. It also means I am human and so are they. This is when I started implementing, with fidelity, the simple Positive Discipline tool called Special Time.