Positive Discipline Parenting Blog

My Top 5 Toddler Parenting Tools

My little baby is now a full-blown toddler. Every stage of development has been such an exciting leap, but it’s at this stage that I’m getting a glimpse into the inner dialogue of my little one’s brain. He is learning to talk and along with language comes a newfound sense of independence and autonomy. This is great when I need to clean up after meals or shoot off a couple of emails, because he can now play by himself for longer periods of time, or even better, help me around the house. It’s a challenge when I have an agenda of what needs to happen now and it doesn’t align with HIS plan. I now understand why virtually every parent of a toddler says their child is “strong-willed”. There’s a parenting myth about the terrible two’s, but what I’ve found is that it doesn’t have to be so terrible if you have some solid Positive Discipline parenting tools in your back pocket.

Getting comfortable with messy play

I’ve been working with kids for over 15 years, and I’ve cleaned up a fair share of messes in that time. I wasn’t someone who initially leaned into messy play because it can be gross, stressful, overwhelming, and because I could always come up with something else that’s fun to do instead. However, the longer I’ve been doing this, the more I’ve gotten not only comfortable, but actually have started enjoying, inviting, celebrating, and really leaning into messy play time! Here’s my why, my how, and some tips I’ve learned along the way.

How to motivate teens and tweens

How do we motivate adolescents?   Sometimes it feels like nobody wants to help around the house, nobody wants to clean their room.  I know, I’ve been there!  We work and work on our relationship with our kids- it’s ongoing.  It’s a practice of connecting, creating and tweaking agreements, problem solving, checking in, and finding solutions.  […]

Tips for validating teens

I like to think of validation as a way to be human to human with my kids. I want them to have the experience of feeling seen. When we validate, it’s an opportunity to let our teens know we can handle them being in their emotions and that we have faith in them to navigate that. Validation improves relationships, deescalates conflict and intense emotions, shows we’re listening without judgment, and that we care. I also think of validation as the opening of a door: when our kids and teens feel seen and not judged, they’re so much more likely to move into a receptive, problem-solving state.

Getting out of our teen’s way

Something that keeps coming up in my class and in my own parenting is the power of the tension of life.  I’ve been thinking about how Jessica Lahey and Ned Johnson both talk about getting out of our kid’s way.  We have to get out of the way so our kids can feel the tension […]

Getting curious about the Belief Behind Behavior

A few years back I did an interview with Alison Smith. It touched on the importance of finding the need beneath the behaviors we see. I also often reference the iceberg metaphor - the idea that behavior we’re seeing is just the tip of the iceberg, and if we can go under the surface and really get to what's fueling the behavior, we can make lasting, sustainable change in our home environment.